Saturday, May 31, 2008

It's Okay to Just Be Okay


Yesterday, nothing went wrong all day. I’m learning to appreciate just getting through the day without anything significant happening. For some unknown reason, Silk didn’t itch her belly or seem bothered by bugs. Siete was a fine and happy little horse. Inside our house, things were normal. The sun was shining, and the temperature was balmy. The hay and grass tasted good. Horses and people were all fine.

These no-drama days would have seemed boring to me when I was younger. Now, I welcome them. I enjoy just following the routine without any annoyances or cause for concern. In fact, I relish it. I know that this easy rhythm can be disrupted in a flash. I try not to wish for more or worry about what I can’t control. I don’t berate myself for tasks that are left un-done.

This acceptance of the day-to-day sameness is completely natural to the horses. They don’t wake up worrying about whether everything is going to be okay today. I have to admit that I always breathe easier when I am greeted by two eager horse heads poking out of the top half of the doors of the barn as I come out to feed the girls each morning. We all made it safely through the night. Let’s hope it will be another uneventful day. It gives me the space to remember who I really am and just be. It grounds me when things eventually do get hectic or the going gets rough. Of course, living with my 93-year old mother and my 13-year old dog color my perception, but it is all a delicate balance.

When I was growing up in a small town in the Midwest, my parents’ routine life drove me crazy. I couldn't wait to leave and go somewhere more exciting. These days, I only hope that I can give my daughter the gift of stability and contentment that was reliably there to come home to whenever I needed it.

We always want more, don’t we? We spend our lives pushing ourselves to the next level and feeling frustrated if it doesn’t happen fast enough. Some days, we scramble just to keep all the balls up in the air. Left to their own choices, I’ve never seen my horses do that. If I’m going to be part of this herd, I’ve got to learn that it’s okay to just be okay.

“What we’re all doing is we’re all managing gracefully.”
Sylvia Boorstein, "It's Easier Than You Think"

12 comments:

Grey Horse Matters said...

I know how you feel and what you mean by just enjoying having a non-stressful very boring day. Oft times there is just too much to do, and never enough time to do it. Though we don't get the time to "just be" like our horses do, when we have a day like that it seems like a gift doesn't it?

Unknown said...

A wonderful post, actually. In our busy lives, my husband and I have adopted a little mantra of "we strive for boredom". I know exactly what you mean by wanting more excitement when you're younger, and more routine and stability when you're older. I spent several years as an EMT, and nothing will teach you faster that "just making it through the night" is truly a blessing.

Victoria Cummings said...

Thanks Arlene and Lynda - I'm glad you know what I'm talking about. It's all back to chaos today, I have to admit that living with my mom who is losing her hearing and her sight is sad and also frustrating for everyone around her.

Deejbrown said...

Your post reminds me of a long-lost poem that begins: "Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are...for one day I will long for all the world for your return."

the7msn said...

Victoria, I think there is a special place in heaven for children who take in their elderly parents. And that is why I will end up in hell. My parents arrive Tuesday for their annual "week with daughter #2." I am still in denial.

billie said...

I'm sitting here listening to George Winston play the piano (on CD, he's not actually in my living room!) and thinking how grateful I am to just be here with everything rolling easy. I can remember younger days when Saturday evenings at 9 p.m. were a frenzy of getting dressed to go out and find the "action." Whatever that meant at the time. I don't think I even knew what it meant THEN. I just didn't want to miss anything!

Ems said...

My old pony Maja (who got to the age of 38) had trouble with mosquitoes, gnats and especially when combined with hot humid weather. We spent ridiculous amounts of money trying to find the Product to help her out and believe me, we tried just about everything. Not only did I have to find something that would work but also something that she would let me put on her (she hated the strong smelling stuff, and so did I). Then we realised that the old remedies were the better ones (and with natural ingredients) and we started using "paste" that had tar in it on the areas that were most exposed and "targeted" by the gnats(under her belly, in her mane and on top of her tail). So for the last 15 years of her life (I had her for 20) we used that as gnats and mosquitoes apparently do not like the smell of tar. I only know of Swedish brands but I'm sure you can find some in the US as well.

It may be a good thing to point out that it doesn't make the coat ugly or sticky as there are other ingredients (all natural) as well and it also softens the skin and relieves the itching and other cuts and scrapes... It worked for us and she could graze without going crazy. I really hope you'll find something that'll work for you and your horses. (Sorry about long post)

Callie said...

I like the mundane routine as well. Although, here it too it is rare and we welcome it with open arms!

William Evertson said...

Nothing went wrong all day - what a powerful teaching. So many times this would happen if we didn't have so many preferences. There are so many times where my preference for an outcome overshadows what would occur naturally. Gerrr - I try to make something happen that may cause tension. I think I'll just concentrate on poking my head out of the stall tomorrow and hope for 'uneventful'. Thank you

Carolynn Anctil said...

Many years ago while I was going through a particularly dark time, I started each morning by listing my blessings. I continue to find that it's a powerful way to focus my attention on all the good that fills my life and to appreciate all the 'little' things - regardless of what may be happening.

I remember hearing a comedian once point out that you know you're an adult when you actually look forward to bedtime.

To: the7msn, LOL! I can so relate!

Rising Rainbow said...

Glad to hear that the itching has subsided a bit. I hope it keeps on that way. Poor horse could use a break, I'm sure.

I can certainly appreciate the days when everything is just okay. I wish there were more of them but then, I am never bored. A nice balance between to two would be good.

Pony Girl said...

Such a lovely post, Victoria. We can all use a day (or two, or three...) of normalacy now and then! I always kind of sigh with relief after I read your blog. As I have told you before, you really keep me grounded. Thank you!